The Grapes Of God

This was an actual conversation in my Acting Through Improv class today:

"I've never eaten tomatoes."

"You've never eaten tomatoes!? Tomatoes are God's grapes. Wait. I don't know what I just said!"

I know too many weird people.

Aw, How Cute!

A few days ago in my American Literature class we were learning about the Salem Witch trials and some kid raised his hand and asked if witches were real. The teacher gave him this sort of look like "Aw, isn't he sweet" and told him that witches do not exist. At the end of class my friend Andrew, who happens to be a Wiccan, and I told her that witches are quite real.

"So you two believe in witches?"

"We don't believe in them, we know some of them."

"Oh, so they believe they're witches?"

I wanted to hurt her. She was treating us like first graders. Andrew, needless to say, was quite pissed off himself. Some people don't seem to understand that Wicca is a religion, not a weird cult or something. I'm friends with more Wiccans then I am with people of any other religion. I felt like saying, "Aw, you believe in Jesus? How cute! You little Christians are so adorable with your faith and all! Want a lollipop?"

That felt good.